


Min Kärlek

by ThoseDaysThatWill



Series: The Organizations [9]
Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Organized Crime, Emotional Manipulation, Finns and Swedes, M/M, Mikko is just trying to lead these walnuts, but he's very aware of it, but usually it's not, it's complicated - Freeform, nothing is ever easy, though this time it's all his own fault
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-15
Updated: 2019-10-15
Packaged: 2020-12-17 03:08:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21047300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThoseDaysThatWill/pseuds/ThoseDaysThatWill
Summary: He sighed again, and Mikko could damn near feel his breath warm on his neck. "I miss you, my love.""Don't call me that." Mikko demanded, sounding much more firm than he felt."Alright. I miss you, Mikko." He damn near purred his name. It was much worse than the pet name.





	Min Kärlek

**Author's Note:**

> This can be read as a stand-alone, but also references other stories in the series.
> 
> I was very torn between calling him "Gabriel" and calling him "Gabe" in the prose. I had it both ways at times, I couldn't decide. So I put the choice on Hannah, who is my best audience for this series. Thank you for that and everything, as always.
> 
> All mistakes are my own, but it's an AU so I meant them, I swear.

  
Mikko had been half asleep when the phone rang. He grabbed for it and answered without checking the caller ID, "Rantanen."

"We need to have a talk."

Mikko sighed. Those were his six least favorite words in the English language. He wasn't a huge fan of the whole language, to begin with, but he especially hated those words. And he hated them more when he didn't recognize the voice that was saying them. "Start with a name, and I'll let you know if we do." He sat up, rubbing his eyes to wake himself all the way up.

"Connor McDavid."

Mikko had been expecting this, but that didn't mean he had to give anything away. "Should I know that name?"

Connor sighed, "Do you really want to play that way, Mr. Rantanen?"

_Kinda, _Mikko though, but didn't say. Instead, he put on his most polite tone, "Please call me Mikko, I can tell we're going to be friends." The sarcasm was dripping from his voice. It was hard to figure out what rank the Canadian people were, because their organization was such a mess. Technically, he supposed, Connor was far above him if he really was running Canada, but practically, Mikko had been doing it a lot longer and had actual rank he was given even if it was two steps lower.

Connor sighed again, "No, we're not."

Mikko copied his sigh without emotion, "You might have just hurt my feelings. But go on, I believe you were about to threaten me?"

Connor cleared his throat, probably biting back a rebuke of his sarcasm. "I don't appreciate you stepping in on my territory."

"I understood your territory to be _Edmonton_... forgive me, I don't remember the name of the province." Mikko lied, smoothly. None of the European powers were formally recognizing Connor's control over his whole country, but everyone admitted that he did run that city.

"Alberta." Connor's tone was sharp, "But you're mistaken. _Canada _is my territory. And we don't appreciate foreigners stepping in and trying to take over. You can carve up the United States all you want, that's your business, but you're not going to take what's mine."

Mikko tried to keep the smile out of his voice, "Yours? Hmm, when I talked with them, they didn't mention you, _Mr. McDavid_. They did have a boss once, but he _disappeared_, which I’m sure you know _nothing_ about." Mikko had talked with a few of the highest ranking people left in Winnipeg, and while none of them seemed to know what really happened to the guy, there were plenty of rumors. Some said he was in Chicago, some said he was somewhere much _warmer_. "Since we're fairly sure he won't come back from where he went, we're in the process of selecting a new leader for them. And they were very _grateful_ for Finland's _protection_ in this difficult time of change. It seems like they don't recognize your claims on them _either_." He carefully emphasized his words, pushing each one hard enough that there was no mistaking what he was telling him. "As I understand it, Canada hasn't been united since Gretzky got all those back-to-back life sentences."

Connor sighed sharply, that was clearly a touchy subject, especially since Edmonton used to be his headquarters. His tone took on a sharp, challenging edge, "Is this a battle you want to take on?"

Mikko laughed, "_Yes_. Do you think your claim on Canada is strong enough to go up against Finland? Do you want us to take even more of your country? Because that's what will happen if you make this stand. But go ahead. I have no problem taking over your whole damn country, if that's what you want. Do you need someone to run the place _right?"_

He could hear Connor take in a deep breath, and his tone was tight and angry, but clearly Mikko has struck _another _nerve, "Stay out of Alberta."

"Unless they come to me for _help_, like the people in Winnipeg did, I will gladly follow that _suggestion_." English gave him a headache and this conversation wasn't making it any better. "Anything else?" When he didn't reply after a moment, Mikko looked at his phone to see he'd been hung up on. "Classy." He grabbed one of his shoes from the floor and launched it at the sleeping body in the other bed.

Sami startled awake, sitting up quickly and grabbing for the gun on his nightstand. Mikko watched him scan the room before his eyes settled on him. "You're lucky I didn't shoot you. What?"

Mikko shook his head, "You ask questions first and shoot second, I know you too well. And 'what' is your _boyfriend _just earned me a threatening call from Connor fucking McDavid." Though it was nice to be speaking Finnish again, his headache didn't ease up.

Sami shrugged, "Congratulations, I think that means you're moving up in the world."

Mikko rolled his eyes, "You're already on my shit list...." Though he couldn't really fault him for the reasons behind what he did, he'd be paying him back for that for a long time to come.

Sami held a hand up, "Alright, alright. What did he say?"

. . . .

"Have you heard the latest about your Finnish... _friend?"_

Gabriel sighed, rolling his eyes despite the fact the caller on the other end couldn't see it, "I don't know who you're talking about."

John scoffed, "Right, of course not. But if you did, what would that information be worth to you?"

He groaned, "What do you want, John?"

John ignored the question, "How _are _things going in Colorado? You still haven't made your presence known there. Is there a reason for that?"

"Not all of us dig our claws in the moment we set sights on a place. Some people like to use finesse." Gabriel countered.

"Of course. But if the Finns stake their claim first, your _finesse _will be for nothing."

"Thanks for the words of warning. Is that why you called?"

"Of course not. But what is good information worth to you?"

"What do you _want?"_

"Your undying gratitude."

Gabriel groaned, "Alright, one favor in the bank. What have you got?"

"The Finns took over Winnipeg in Canada."

"So? Why the fuck do I care what's happening in Canada?"

"Let me better phrase that: _Mikko Rantanen _took over Winnipeg in Canada."

Gabriel took in a sharp breath, just like John expected him to. "Did he?" He did not miss the note of pride in Gabriel's voice.

"He did. And I have even more interesting news."

"Whatever you want, John."

"Mmm good. According to one of my Canadian sources, of which I have a few, Rantanen managed to take over Winnipeg, Canada, from Denver, Colorado."

"He's here?"

"He's there."

There was silence on the other end of the line and then, "Alright, I owe you."

"Yes, you do. Good luck." And with that, John hung up.

. . . .

For the second time in two nights, Mikko's phone woke him up. "Rantanen." This was really getting old.

"You didn't tell me you were in Denver." Gabriel's voice slithered up his spine and coiled around his throat, making him feel lightheaded far too fast. Fuck, why hadn't he checked the caller ID? He would never have answered if he knew it was him. Which is probably exactly why he called at this ungodly hour of the morning.

Mikko took in a deep breath. "That's because I'm not." He lied. He was annoyed to hear his reply come out in the same Swedish Gabriel was speaking. It was automatic that they would use _his_ language and Mikko found himself wishing he had been able to think fast enough to reply in Finnish. But of course, that was ridiculous. At the brothel they had all been well trained to respond immediately in the language that the client used, which was why both Swedish and English lessons were deemed worth the expense since none of them had attended school much past twelve. Mikko had done all he could to forget his Swedish, but it was too ingrained.

Gabriel tisked, "Mikko... my love, don't you know you can't lie to me?"

Mikko closed his eyes, fighting hard against how those words warmed his stomach and parts further south. That man could do things with his voice that others couldn't do with both hands. But he couldn't let that show, not even a little. He knew full well what Gabriel would do with even the hint of his compliance. "I'm not there. You might have heard some of my crew is around. But I'm in Finland."

He sighed, clearly not believing his lies for one moment. "Well, that's a shame, because I wanted to see you."

Mikko ignored the way his chest tightened at that. He grabbed for the glass on the nightstand, aware of how dry his mouth suddenly became. After a long sip of very watered down whiskey, he felt a little calmer, "I don't want to see you."

Gabriel made a soft disappointed sound that felt like a stab right to his heart. Damn him. _Damn him_. "I'm sorry to hear that."

Mikko felt the urge to take it back, to apologize for being rude, but he knew he couldn't. He had to be stronger than that, if not for himself, for his crew. He couldn't afford to be dragged back into his web, it put too many of his people in danger. "Is that all you wanted?"

He sighed again, and Mikko could damn near feel his breath warm on his neck. "I miss you, my love."

"Don't call me that." Mikko demanded, sounding much more firm than he felt.

"Alright. I miss you, _Mikko_." He damn near purred his name. It was much worse than the pet name.

"Why don't you come to Finland and see me?" Mikko's voice took on a hard edge. They both knew full well that after everything he'd done, if Gabriel so much as crossed the Finnish border, he'd be shot on sight. There was no way he could make it out of Turku alive.

He huffed out another sigh, "I expected better of you."

Mikko scoffed, "No, you didn't. You knew exactly what you'd get when you called. Why did you do it?"

Gabriel sighed, "Mikko, _Mikko,_ you're not listening to me. I _missed _you. And someone told me you were in town and I wanted to see you. That's the reason I called. If you hate me so much, why did you answer?"

"I was asleep."

Gabriel hummed softly, "Forgive me for waking you up so abruptly. As you well know, I'm usually much more gentle about it."

Mikko managed to hold back the groan, but he was right. He could feel Gabriel's hand sliding over his bare shoulder, his voice whispering beside his ear, reminding him he needed to leave soon, they couldn't afford for anyone to get suspicious, couldn't let anyone see him leave his house. He had to slip out, like he had slipped in, like he was breaking into the place rather than a welcomed guest. He had never explained why he couldn't be seen, but in his profession, Mikko was used to that. But the whole thing was accentuated with notes of regret. Mikko could still hear him, _I wish you could stay, my love_. The kisses that followed made him believe it was true. But of course he knew now it was all a lie, a game.

He didn't realize he hadn't said anything until he heard the soft chuckle, and Gabriel's voice, "I see you still remember."

"I'm trying to forget." Mikko countered, frustrated at how easily Gabriel read even his silence.

"I'm not so easy to forget, am I, my love?" His voice was a whisper, a caress Mikko couldn't help but feel.

He took in a deep breath, trying to clear his head, "I told you not to call me that."

Gabriel sighed, "I know. But not to would be a lie. Because I _do _still love you, Mikko. Everything I did was _because _I love you. And I know, no matter how much you try to push me away, you still love me. Do you really want to tell me that you don't love me?"

Mikko said nothing. His breath was shaky, but he tried his best to control that.

Gabriel gave a soft pleased sound, as if he had heard the words anyway, "Come see me, my love."

Mikko ground his teeth together for a silent minute. And then heard himself speak against his will, "Text me your address."

Gabriel let out a slow breath, as if he was worried, as if he didn't already know how this would end. "Very good. I'll see you soon." He took in another breath, "I love you."

Mikko's voice was softer than a whisper, "I love you too." And he hung up.

At the sound of shifting fabric, he glanced over to the other bed, to find Sami wide awake and watching him. He knew Sami's Swedish wasn't as good as his, but he still could get the jist of the conversation, if he'd been listening. And Mikko was sure that he had been, probably from the moment the phone rang. He heard his phone's text message sound, but didn't pick it up.

Sami sighed, "Mikko...."

He held up a hand, "We all have our sins, Sami. Our secrets."

Sami nodded slowly, "We do. Some more dangerous than others. Just... be careful, okay?"

Mikko nodded as he got up to get dressed, "I always am."

Mikko sat in his car outside the house for a long moment. The house was large and ornate, very much his style. He had no doubt Gabriel already knew he was there, he couldn't afford to have anything less than the top of the line security. But all the same, Mikko sat there, arguing with himself. The pit of guilt had started to form the moment he hung up the phone. Sami's knowing look and understanding reply hadn't made him feel any better. And then choosing a shirt from his bag that he knew Gabriel would approve of doubled the knot. He had always wanted Mikko to look nice, never jeans and tshirts, no hoodies, never anything so casual. When he was paying, he had every right to choose what he'd wear, but now? Now it shouldn't matter. But Mikko knew too well what he wanted to see to pretend he didn't.

Finally, with a deep breath, he got out of the car, and walked to the door. He knocked, and waited.

Gabriel sighed the moment he opened the door, "You are still so beautiful, my love." He always said something like that, some kind of comment on how he looked, a compliment on his clothes, or his hair, something physical. Mikko had wondered if it was supposed to remind him of why he was there, but once he stopped paying, and the compliments continued, he decided that was just his way. Or maybe he _needed_ to think that. Gabriel gestured him inside and Mikko stepped past him, looking around.

He was surprised to find the inside of the house an almost exact replica of the one he'd had in Helsinki. Maybe some of the details were off, here and there, but for the most part, it was the same, and nothing could have been more familiar to him. He stepped up to the leather couch, running his hand along the back, fighting back all the memories that dragged up. He didn't startle at feeling his hand on his shoulder. "Is it the same one?" Mikko asked, softly.

"No. When I left Finland, I had to leave everything behind." Gabriel's voice was soft, beside his ear, his body so close but not touching him.

Mikko shooks his head, "But you replicated it all. Why?"

Gabriel sighed, "You. I knew you'd come home someday. Even if that home had to be here in Denver."

He took in a sharp breath at that. It didn't matter if it was a lie or not, it still made his chest tighten and his head spin. Even if that wasn't true, Gabriel _wanted _him to believe it was true and that was nearly enough of a reason to get emotional about it. And if he was telling the truth... Mikko sighed, stepping sideways to get a few paces away from him, but turned to face him, "You don't expect me to believe that, do you?"

Gabriel shook his head, sadly, "You really don't understand, do you?"

Mikko's shoulders dropped, "Understand what?"

"Those years in Helsinki... that time with you... that was the _happiest_ I have ever been." He looked sincere, his eyes holding Mikko's so easily. But Mikko knew better. He could lie as easily as he could breathe. He'd been fooled too many times to ever believe a word that came out of his mouth without corroboration. Gabriel slid his hand from his shoulder to cup his cheek, "You've always doubted me, my love. But you shouldn't. I thought the money would convince you, but that wasn't enough, was it?"

Mikko sighed. The money _had _nearly convinced him. Gabriel had been running scams for years in the heart of Finland before he was discovered. He'd disguised himself as a businessman, uninvolved, innocent, hard-working, with only one small vice, legal if naughty. The first time he stepped foot into the brothel, he caught a lot of eyes. A man that good looking didn't _need _to pay for it. Mikko was just barely eighteen and Gabriel looked much older than his twenty-three, but all the same, he had _hoped _he'd chose him. By the time Gabriel's scams were caught, Mikko was in love, and Gabriel had long since stopped paying for the privilege, though they were sneaking around a lot more. Just before he left Finland for what would be the last time, he transferred all of his offshore accounts into the name of one of Mikko's aliases. It amounted to many millions, free and clear, with a note that he'd never have to _work _again. Mikko hadn't touched a dime of it. "I don't want your money."

Gabriel sighed, "You haven't used it, have you?"

Mikko shook his head, "I told you I didn't want it. I'm not for _sale_. Not anymore."

Gabriel pulled away from him, giving another sharp sigh, "I wasn't trying to _buy _you! I wanted you to be _comfortable_. I wanted you to never have to sell your body again. Once you gave me that gift freely, I understood how _wrong _it was that anyone could take it for money. You could have paid off your debts. You could have paid off _all _their debts! Why didn't you use it?"

Mikko rolled his eyes, "Are you really that naive? How was I going to explain that money? My _Swedish _lover has been scamming our Organization for years, and he's given me the proceeds? Do you understand how _fast _that would have gotten me killed? Did you even think about what it would have meant if anyone had found that money?"

"I... just wanted to take care of you, my love." He admitted with what sounded like _real _honesty.

Mikko let out a slow breath, running a hand through his hair, "Well, it's all still there, you can have it back. I can take care of myself just fine."

"Why are you so stubborn?" Gabriel snapped.

Mikko laughed, though there wasn't much humor in it, "You chose a Finn. If you wanted sweet and demure, you could have found that in your own country."

He stepped closer and Mikko did all he could not to take a step backwards. Gabriel sighed, "What can I do to convince you? Name it, and I'll do it."

He shook his head, "You can't."

"_Mikko... my love. _I've explained everything, I've told you the truth, more of the truth than I've ever told anyone. I put the ability to destroy me into your hands. What more could I do?" Gabriel sighed, "What would you have done if I had been honest with you that first night? Told you who I was right away."

"I would have turned you in." Mikko replied, honestly. He had already told him that, they'd already played this scene, but he was too tired to try to talk him out of playing it again. Keeping his guard up around him was _exhausting_.

"And I'd be dead." Gabriel knew his lines well.

Mikko stepped out of his touch again, "I know why you didn't tell me then... I was just your entertainment. But later... when you claimed to love me? All those things you said to me, those plans and dreams. They were just jokes. When I told you I loved you? Who did I love? I never knew who you were, I still don't. I loved the image you showed me, but it wasn't real. I never knew you. I don't know who you are at all."

"No, my love. You're the only one that ever has." The sincerity in his voice was _painful_ and Mikko turned away. "I know you don't believe that, but it's true. I've played so many parts, so many games, but lying in bed with you... that was _me_. When I knew I was falling in love with you... I wanted you to love _me_. You have my heart, Mikko. You're the only one I've ever showed it to, the only one I've ever wanted to be completely open and honest with. You have the power to take me down, so if you think it's all a lie _use it_. I'll give you Sundin's number, I'll give you Forsberg's number, call them. Use what I've told you, they'll be happy to kill me for it. Because if it was all a game, if I was just playing with you, then I _deserve _it."

Mikko didn't say anything. He didn't dare look at him. He could feel the pricks of tears in his eyes, but he fought hard against them. He took in a deep breath, but heard it catch. He didn't bother to hide it. It wasn't like Gabriel didn't know he was getting to him, it wasn't that he didn't know exactly the words to use, the tone to put on, the way to manipulate him into falling right back into his game. It wasn't the first time he'd offered to let Mikko be the literal death of him, it wouldn't be the last. He knew damn well he'd never take him up on it. Mikko couldn't do it and they both knew it. That was why he offered.

"Please..." Gabriel's voice was shaking, "Look at me."

Mikko hesitated, but slowly turned around, trying as best he could to keep his expression neutral. But all that effort was for nothing once he caught sight of Gabriel's expression. He was _crying_. Mikko had never seen him cry. Many times they'd had this fight, it looked like he _wanted _to cry, but never were there tears. Maybe he'd taught himself to cry on command since the last time... or maybe... maybe they were real. Mikko's chest felt so tight he was surprised he could still take in breaths. "The tears are a nice touch." His voice didn't sound nearly as cold as he wanted it to, but it was closer than he'd been in the past.

Gabriel sighed heavily, letting his head drop, "I'll never be able to convince you, will I? No matter how honest I am, how much I tell you, whatever I'm willing to do.... it's just too late, isn't it?"

"Of course it's too late." Mikko replied, as he stepped closer to him. He reached up, swiping a thumb under Gabriel's eye, "It's been too late for a very long time." He leaned in, closing his eyes as he kissed him. He felt Gabriel startle and he smiled at that. He liked the idea that for once, he hadn't known for _sure _that he'd give in. It only lasted a second, but they both knew now that there had been some doubt.

The one thing that could be said about Gabriel, with all honesty, was that he knew how to kiss. He wrapped his arms around Mikko, and once he regained his sense, took over the kiss. It was deep and passionate, and Mikko couldn't help but get lost in the feeling. Whores don't kiss, so Gabriel always made a point to kiss him for a long as he would allow it. His kisses always said more than his words, overwhelming in the best way. Mikko had always enjoy that more than anything else they'd done together, and Gabriel well knew it. This kiss was half a step away from sweeping him off his feet when he finally pulled away. Gabriel made a soft whimpering sound, "Please don't leave."

"It'll cost extra if you want me to spend the night." Mikko's breathy voice gave away the faux casual tone, though.

Gabriel scoffed, "Stop that. I've never allowed you to talk like that and I'm not about to start now."

"When you were paying for my time, you could dictate how I talked." Mikko found a sense of control from somewhere.

Gabriel gave him a very obvious once-over, his hands still on Mikko's hips, "And how you dressed. But clearly I've taught you something there. And if you can still dress well, you can speak well about the man I love." He moved closer, sliding his arms around him again, "And I do love you, Mikko. I love you so much."

Mikko sighed, "I don't know what to do with that. Your love is too dangerous." That was the truth, whether Gabriel wanted to hear it or not. Consorting with the enemy was bad enough, he knew. That _alone _could get him killed. But this enemy had _embarrassed _Finland, he had operated right under their noses for _years_, scamming their money without them suspecting a thing. He had worked with some of the highest ranking members of their Organization and they had suspected nothing. Even admitting that Gabriel had once hired him could lose him the position he'd carved out for himself, and possibly even his life.

"I understand that. I never wanted to put you in that position. And if you really want me to leave you alone, I will." Gabriel pulled him closer, tight against his body, whispering beside his ear, "But... just for tonight? Stay with me, my love. Let me make love to you." 

Mikko closed his eyes, letting his words wash over him, feeling himself nod completely against his will. Or at least he wanted it to be against his will. The real truth was he had _missed_ him. He thought about him, about what they had, the honesty of their emotions, and he felt that sense of loss, the emptiness. The ache of missing him came floating through his mind almost daily, even if he tried to ignore it, even if he tried to move on. And to be in his arms again was too much, too close to what he dreamed about so many nights, he wasn't strong enough to resist it, not then and not now. _"Please."_

. . . .

Gabriel watched Mikko sleep beside him for a long moment. He had become accustomed to waking early, but he didn't move from the bed. It had been so long since he'd seen him, no matter having him laying beside him in his bed like that, and he had missed him. In everything he had said, that he loved him with his whole heart, was the honest truth. He was deeply in love, and Mikko was right, it was dangerous. It was dangerous for both of them, but for very different reasons. He reached out to gently stroke his cheek, smiling when Mikko murmured in his sleep and turned towards him. Asleep he had an unearthly beauty that Gabriel had a hard time looking away from. He forced himself to pull away to pick up his phone from the nightstand, and sent a text.

<< _Everything is going according to my plan._


End file.
